Alone for too long

Third day. I cant help but to count the days that she left and the days till we meet again. There are times when I regret my actions for not telling her sooner so that we could have spend more time together before she goes back.

Being alone now is much tougher than I expected. She went back to the states couple of time before but now, I cannot go to sleep at night without hearing her say good night and I look forward to wish her good morning on the next day.

To have nobody in my life is not something new to me. After my last real relationship, I close my heart to anyone. There are girls that I might have a small crush on but it remains as a crush. There were no one that I would take the risk of opening my heart to other than her. Almost 10 years has it been since I have felt this way about someone. During those times, I spend my hours playing video games and hang out with bro-buddies. I did not take care of myself during that period at all. I have become so accustom to being a single guy, it is a little tough adjusting to this new life but its one I am willing to learn and change.

I found a song that sums up what I wish I can tell her to assure that I am in this for the long run. Just that every time I talked to her, I could not conjure these words that express them.

Plain White T's - Hey There Delilah